1. Understand your self worth
Every life coach, psychologist, healer etc on the planet will tell you how important this is yet very few can help you do it. The problem, with self-worth is that it is not something the intellect can process. If you struggle with this issue be sure you are not alone. Although in your conscious mind you know you have just as much reason to be as worthy as the person next to you, in all probability you have so many subconscious beliefs upholding the belief that you are not as worthy as them that it is impossible to buy into the fact. No matter how many people, adverts or media etc try to convince you that “you are worth it” unless your subconscious gets the message from a non-intellectual source nothing will change.
In the past, it has been in the interests of the social system that you have very little self worth. How else could so many people be convinced that it is a good thing to run into a barrage of gunfire, knowing they are going to die in the next minute? How else could so many people be slaughtered in the name of power? How else could whole countries bow and scrape and believe in the supreme godhead of a leader just by dint of birthright? But I digress. Now, we have time to look at ourselves very deeply and ask “Why do I feel that I must treat the person next to me considerately, caringly, respectfully and fairly when they do not reciprocate this attitude towards me and I accept that as somehow right? What do I believe they have that I don’t have to think their life is more important than mine? What belief do I hold that makes this disparity so right?
The truth is that we all came into this world naked and we all go out naked. There is absolutely no difference at the end of the day if you are a good person, a rich person, an intellectual whizzkid or a street sweeper, we all die. No one can take any power or accumulated possessions with them. To put this in a more grounded perspective, everybody has to go to the toilet and no one can glorify that fact.
So the first step you can practically take to recognizing and accepting your own self worth is to imagine everyone you meet sitting on the loo. Immediately the playing fields will be levelled in your head and your subconscious mind. Then it is much easier to give yourself some slack and be more confident and relaxed. And feeling more confident and relaxed is a prerequisite for enhancing your inner power!
2. Set your boundaries
Boundaries are necessary. Children need them, adults need them, animals need them, countries need them, companies need them. People need to know where they stand. They need a guideline to acceptable behaviour and they need to know if the boundary is real or fake.
When you allow your own personal boundaries to be overstepped you will open yourself to all kinds of abuse mental and physical. Children who have never been given firm boundaries often find it impossible to set their own in later life. Again, we are so much at the mercy of our subconscious beliefs that just telling someone to keep boundaries is all but impossible.
However, once you grasp the loo concept, it is easy to understand that you need to shut the door so you can poo in private. This is the boundary. And this is where you can apply the same principle to your own life. For instance, a loo space of mine is where you cannot verbally tear me to shreds and then go on as if it never happened. I might tolerate a lot of other disrespect, but not this. This is where I draw the line, this is the shut door of the loo. If you feel you need to behave like this, fine, but do not expect me to take what you say seriously or expect me to stay anywhere in your space. I would rather be homeless and out on the street than allow myself to be subject to that.
So choose a boundary. A small boundary, like do not use my —-(insert personal item) without my permission. Never allow that boundary to be overstepped. Then rinse and repeat without fail. Die in the process if you have to, but do not ever go back on this boundary. Shut the toilet door! Small as it may be you begin to respect yourself more by doing this and ‘voila!’ you have fulfilled another prerequisite for enhancing your inner power.
3. Know what you have to do and do it no matter what
So you knit booties for babies. That is your passion. You love it, you feel good about yourself doing it. You have no reason other than you like it, to do it. In your head you can see yourself keeping all the little babies feet in the world warm and cosy. And somehow you feel that even though no one else sees it, you know each and every baby on a very deep level feels loved and cared for because their feet are warm and lovingly dressed.
Or you put rockets into space. You can’t wait for the next launch. You live for the next mission the next challenge, the adventure, the excitement, the satisfaction of accomplishing the impossible. The hours of study and research are all part of the process. This is your passion.
No one can judge that either of the above scenarios has more value than the next. Yes, one may be more glamorous, seen to be more elite or special. But really, we all love to do different things and it is our differences that give depth and interest to our lives. So find your passion. What do you love to do? What gets you up in the morning with a spring in your step. Find that and do it no matter what. No matter if you can only spend five minutes on it at a time. No matter if it seems stupid to others. Tap into that which taps into your heart and just do it. After all its your life and if you don’t do the things that make you feel happy and alive you might just die thinking what was the point. Inner power grows by recognizing that which is important to you regardless of anyone else out there and washing your hands of anyone else’s problems for a few minutes while you attend to your own happpiness.
In summary, three easy steps to enhancing your inner power are:
Accepting your own self worth by recognizing that everyone, just like you, has to go to the loo.
Setting some small but personal boundaries which in your eyes are worth fighting for, i.e. shut the toilet door — everyone is entitled to some privacy.
Do something as often as you can just for your own pleasure. i.e.Wash your hands of everyone else’s problems for a while.
Do these three small steps and you will feel more empowered to live life on your own terms.